WE HAVE BECOME A NATION OBSESSED WITH LISTS. ASK SOMEBODY FOR AN OPINION THESE DAYS AND YOU’LL MORE THAN LIKELY GET THREE ANSWERS BACK. EVEN SIMPLE THINGS SUCH AS NAMING FAVOURITE PLAYER OF ALL TIME OR EVEN WHAT’S GOOD TO WATCH ON TV FOR THE EVENING, IT SEEMS ONE ANSWER IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

This habit of putting things into lists is now reflected in the way the media, both TV and the papers, report the news. If a big event happens, it is no longer good enough to simply give details of the event itself, you have to include somewhere in the report a list of how big that event is compared to similar events, or perhaps list what the possible knock-on effects of that event could be.

Take a look at any sports section of a newspaper these days and look for the lists. Highest transfer fee, fastest 100m race of all time, tallest basketball player, biggest fish ever caught in the Thames Estuary . . . don’t worry, there’ll be a list there somewhere, two or three if you are lucky. For years people have poked fun at the ‘Anoraks’ obsessed with apparently useless information and statistics, but take a good look in your cupboard because I reckon there are a lot more Anoraks tucked away out there.

When Alan Smith received a red card in the Manchester derby last weekend, it was not long before my email queue was buzzing with enquiries and opinions. Is he the dirtiest player of all time? Is he the unluckiest player of all time? Does he get sent off because he gets noticed more by referees due to his reputation/hair/shirt hanging out?

I don’t know.

What I can tell you though is the facts. Smith’s red card against Manchester City moved him into double figures for sendings off. Ten red cards by the age of 24 is no mean feat and puts Smith’s total just one behind the career record of a certain Roy Keane, who is more of a mild rover these days compared to the pit-bull we used to see patrolling Manchester United’s midfield.

You would have to add their total together though to get to the worst offender in British football. Former Scotland international Willie Johnston would be manna from heaven for the Tabloid newspapers if he was playing today. Sent home from the 1978 World Cup for failing a drugs test, Johnston managed to get himself sent off 21 times during a career spent largely with Rangers and West Brom.

My favourite Johnston incident was in a third-round League Cup tie in 1976, when, playing for West Brom against Brighton, he took a dislike to referee Derek Doyle and attempted to kick the official up into the air. Unrepentant, Johnston summed up his career by saying: ‘Okay, so I was sent off about 20 times, but I played for 22 seasons, so it was under one a season. That’s not too bad.’

On that basis, if Smith is 24 now, plays on until he is 36 and gets sent off once a season from here on, he may stand a chance of matching Johnston’s all-time high (or ‘low’, depending on your viewpoint).

Realistically, Johnston’s infamous record may never be matched. The great Vinnie Jones finished way off the mark, collecting a meagre 12 sendings off with five different League clubs, and among the current crop of ‘bad boys’, Arsenal’s Patrick Vieira is lagging way behind. His red card while playing for France against the Faroe Islands in September was the 10th of his career.

Closest to Johnston’s 21 is Millwall player-manager Dennis Wise, who, with 13 sendings off to his name already, does have time to sneak another one in before hanging up his boots at the end of the season. With eight bookings in 17 appearances already this season, he’s obviously doing his best.